Letting go… of not allowing myself to be supported

I was listening to Janet Gallin’s radio show, Love Letters Live the other day. The interviewee Jane Bragg was talking about a breakthrough she had during an actualization workshop. She spoke beautifully about how cement blocks around her heart came crumbling down and she no longer felt alone. In her words: “for the first time in my life, I felt I was sitting in a chair and it was holding me.”

The comment made its way deep into my heart. I was struck by its beauty and was almost envious of the experience it must have been. Allowing ourselves to be supported is something so basic and simple. And like most things simple, so hard to achieve.

How do we let go of all the walls, shields and barriers we have constructed around ourselves. Do the walls that I have created around myself help me in any way? Or do they simply hinder me from feeling supported by that chair?

Why do some of us want to do everything by ourselves? Why not allow these walls to dissolve and allow ourselves to be supported – by the chair, by our people, by our community, by our world... Can we allow layers of distrust to dissolve, to allow confidence in being supported to emerge, to dare to not feel alone…

I want to walk on the ground and feel completely supported by it. I want to sit in that chair and feel completely supported by it.

And the first step in being supported may be to allow myself to be supported. And that may be the most and again, the only difficult step in the process.