So how much help do we need? And where are we getting it?

When life gets challenging, we start to search for solutions, inspiration, the meaning of it all… (okay, okay, maybe only the crazy ones do the last). We want to know how to beat the darn thing and get back to living our life. Or we need help to wade through life – challenge or not. I suspect as a society, we are increasingly on that quest – and the shelves and shelves of self help book seem to be a testament.

I suppose I have tried to do similarly. Not very convincingly, not very disciplinedly (and yes that is now a word), but by jove, I’ve tried. I’ve tried books on diet and nutrition, I’ve tried meditation (which I recommend – whether or not I do it myself), I’ve leafed through several self help books – ranging from spirituality (which I do find interesting), “positive thinking” (gosh I think I detest that expression – so obviously it has not worked for me, right?), to lifestyle (awe-filled eyes at healthy disciplined folks – and I have a fairly healthy lifestyle even), to parenting books (sigh…I will not even tread on those waters)

Most such books make me feel pretty awful. Most such books – I read only a few pages. Most such books I borrow from the library. I don’t dare purchase them, for I don’t want most such books to be staring at me from bookshelves – taunting me, reminding me of the unfinished pages, of the unfollowed (yes, that is now a word too) advice.

Not to doubt the intention and sound advice of the self-help gurus. The intentions and advice are probably perfect. But I just want to turn the other way when I hear a list of 10 things to do to achieve Nirvana (and yes if that list did exist, I would beat you all to get it. I would end up not following it and then wonder why I was the only one not Nirvanified (and yes, that too is now a word)).

Yeah yeah, I know I sound pissed. I probably am. But I wonder if I’m pissed that I feel the need to search for so much wisdom – wisdom so outside of myself, wisdom that I am unable to follow, wisdom that leaves me feeling defeated – for its inability to work in my case and situation.

Now I love books and I have nothing against them. Books make me feel, think, inspire, open up my imagination and my world and all that good stuff. Nor am I trying to diss the self-help gurus out there and their brilliant advice. I just want to question if there is a sense of overwhelm that accompanies such books, the same sense of overwhelm that prevents me from getting past only a few pages. Can these make us deem ourselves less competent, less able to face the situation, less able to look for answers within ourselves?

Maybe it’s just a case of sour grapes. And even if it is, I want to be able to hold on to my energy and confidence and perhaps some such books will help me to do so; but I certainly don’t want the overwhelm from mounds of such  books (despite their best intentions) to take that away from me.


p.s. everybody has a right to be pissed some days... hmm... I need to pick a book on "positive thinking" (sic) you say??